The capacity to create and maintain relationships is not only central to our health but also our survival as a species. Empathy is central to this, a capacity which is influenced by the nature and timing of different developmental influences. Modern environments are, according to Bruce Perry, impoverished of ‘somatosensory-rich, relational interactions’ (Touch, holding, rocking, intergenerational interaction, conversation).
Perry points out that as society has become more mobile, people move away from their extended families. The nuclear family is becoming smaller and families eat fewer meals together. In small-band hunter-gatherer groups the ratio of developmentally more mature individuals who could educate and enrich younger brains was 4:1. Now, we consider one caregiver for every four children at pre-school level an enriched environment. In primary school there is one adult for every 25 or 30 children. Screen time has reduced ‘face-time’ leading to the ‘dilution of the relational milieu’ creating a relational poverty for children. Relationships are the food that brains grow on, so such a deficit can be expected to have serious social and emotional consequences. This relational poverty, Perry claims, is far more destructive than economic poverty. The compartmentalisation of home and work, choices around childrearing, and consumer habits like preferences for owning homes where everyone has their own room and TV all contribute to what is a high-risk social experiment unprecedented throughout human history.
The brain develops in a ‘use-dependant’ fashion. Therefore, a dearth of relational experiences will lead to a deficit in the capacity for empathy and other social functions. Our individual and collective capacity for resilience in the face of adversity is based on our relational health. In a time where numerous global crises cluster on the horizon, we are urgently called to course-correct this developmental trajectory.